Long time no write...

So, I don't really have anything in particular that I want to write about. I have just recently realised how much I miss writing.

Life is so busy, we often forget to do the things we actually love to do. I always think there is no point in writing if I nothing really interesting to say, or just for the sake of it. But I logged onto my blog page and I people are still reading my blog when I haven't even posted for months.

Someone also asked if I was still blogging because I hadn't posted anything for ages and they assumed I was feeling better because of this. I do feel better than I did when I first started writing this blog, but anxiety and worry is something I still deal with on a daily basis. But I suddenly realised it was seemed a little bit selfish of me to have only been writing during the time I was feeling my worst when every day is a struggle for some people. Plus you don't even have to have any specific reason to need a pick me up or a touch of motivation.

To see that people are still reading and using my blog as a way of helping themselves made me feel so happy. I guess I'm just trying to say I am still here, I still appreciate and feel overwhelmed that people even read my ramblings. And to remind everyone as well as myself, to never stop doing something you love because life gets in the way. Do what makes you happy :)

Be Kind to yourself...

Surprise Surprise I have been spending some time over thinking for a change. 

Being a person who wants to help other people I think it is very easy to forget about yourself sometimes. 

Since I have felt so much better anxiety wise,  I try and do a lot more than I would of dreamed of doing even just this time last year. 

When a day comes along where I think I dont feel 100% I get a huge feeling of guilt and tell myself I shouldn't be feeling like that, especially when I am supposed to be helping other people on a daily basis. I feel like I should be OK all the time and will let people down if I am not. 

I think again it comes down to comparing to other people and that you aren't a strong person if admit that you are struggling from time to time. 

I even feel I shouldn't write things on here anymore because it shows that I am not fine all of the time. Which in reality without me starting this blog and admitting how I was really feeling, I wouldn't be at the place I am today anyway. 

At the end of the day we are all human and it is perfectly fine to admit to having a wobble. When we have one of those days when we aren't really feeling ourselves, it is just a kind reminder that we do actually need to be a little selfish sometimes. 

You can't be there for other people if you aren't there for yourself. 

Positivity...

A couple of weeks ago over a coffee and a catch up, one of my lovely friends told me about something she had recently started doing with some of her other friends.

This was to send each other a five positive things about their life or that day first thing every morning.

I said that this sounded like a fab idea and could she please do the same for me! I have been guilty of being a tad pessimistic and thought this would be really helpful for me! Having my pessimistic head on I thought maybe some days there won't be anything for me to put!

We have been doing this every day for the past few weeks and I'm surprised how much it has helped and how much I have enjoyed doing it.
No matter how rubbish your day has been you can look back and realise that there is still something good about it!

These five things don't have to be huge and life changing. What is great about it is that even just the little things in life, that can often be taken for granted, get remembered.

It is also really nice to hear someone else's positives as well as your own!
It is definitely worth giving it a try, what can be bad about starting the day with a positive thought!

Also, If you forget in the morning you could share what the highlight of that day was in the evening instead!

You time...

We live in a society where we have to be busy and maybe this is a way most people distract themselves from any bigger things going on in their lives. I know myself going from doing pretty much nothing on a daily basis just after finishing University to now the opposite within less than a year, whenever I have the time to do nothing I immediately feel guilty for just sitting there and try and find myself something worthwhile to do.

I think it is important to find the right balance between keeping busy and still making sure you embrace those days where you really have nothing to do.

It seems like people assume that the busier you are the more successful you are and giving yourself a rest can be misunderstood as laziness. I suppose its difficult to truly rest when we live in a society where nothing ever really stops. Even when you decide to treat yourself and have some time to relax, we are still obsessing over social networking sites and immediately feel guilty for sitting there in your dressing gown.

I think that even though being busy is linked with being in control it is still so important to allow yourself time to relax and rest. We should all be able to have moments where we are selfish and prioritise hobbies or just the little things that make us happy. Life shouldn't just be filled with things we have to do but also things we want to do! Make a 'To do' list with all the things you want to do (no matter how big or small)  instead of all those chores or deadlines.

I love days when I think of something to write about on my blog, and have the time to just sit down and let the typing take over. Recently I have also been doing some Yoga every week by myself using 'Yoga with Adriene' on YouTube it is really good to just take as little as 20 mins a day to have some you time! Go on, Treat yourself :)

  

Happy 1st Birthday It's always tea time...

Exactly a year ago I wrote my first ever blog post . Never in a million years did I believe I would get the response I did.

I am literally overwhelmed sometimes that people say my little blog has actually helped them personally. That's all I wanted to do and all I want to carry on doing.
Even just helping one person have that conversation with someone that they haven't been feeling themselves recently, somebody taking the massive step in telling their own personal experiences or just putting a smile on someone's face with a positive quote, I feel like I have accomplished exactly what I set out to do.

One massively negative part of my life has resulted in so many positives. I have made new friends and got in touch with old friends too and I feel so grateful for having that opportunity.

I want to give people the courage to stay strong and not give up. Believe that you can do it no matter how long it takes and how many times you try. The more times you experience those terrible feelings, the more you start to realise that you will only come back stronger. The feelings may start to get less and less but it's because you aren't scared of them anymore. Accept the thoughts and feelings instead of fighting them. Tell yourself you have been here before, you have felt this crap before and you were ok and you will be ok again.

Think of your mind like a garden. You have the power and the resources to plant what thoughts are in there. Some gardens take a little more looking after than others and some grow weeds. But you have the opportunity with the right help to get rid of those weeds and replace them with the flower 's you like the best.

Understand...

It's another one of those times where thoughts are swimming around my mind and there's no better place to say them out loud than my blog.

I have recently got the Timehop app, (I know behind with the times or what?) But I noticed the other day it's 3 years since I started feeling a little iffy with what I know now to be Anxiety.

I have been thinking and wondering what was different back then and why I am where I am now. Although it has been numerous different things collectively, one thing has stood out more recently.

That thing is just 'understanding'. Understanding anxiety, knowing what it is and it in context to me and my experiences. I now know where it came from in the first place and what triggers it still.

I don't feel better because it's just disappeared and I'm completely 'cured'. It is just because I know exactly what it is and why it can make you feel like it does. Let's be honest 3 years is quite a while to feel like you finally have control of something which controlled you for all that time. I have control now because I have the knowledge.

Having anxiety alone and all its lovely feelings and symptoms it brings with it can be pretty terrifying so add a bit of poor understanding and it popping up at the most random and inconvenient moments and no wonder this thing can consume you and control you like you are a puppet.

I got to the point previously where I thought my anxiety was me and I was making decisions and doing things based on that. Now I know so much about it all, it is something which is part of me but I can manage it so much better.

Just think, how much time and energy would be saved if people just understood about mental health and why it may need some TLC from time to time.

It has also helped me that I have been able to explain what it is and why it happens to my family.  My Mum has said herself that due to her having more understanding she has been able to empathise with other people and pass on information to them too.

As humans we are often scared of the unknown so why make something which can be so disconcerting even more so just because we've made it ok not to know what it is.

Let's get talking and sharing information about mental health and hopefully one day it won't be such a taboo anymore!

Happy New Year...

To be honest, I have felt a bit weird about writing on my blog for the past couple of months. I think in some ways it's because I am in a different place in comparison to when I began writing my blog both mentally and quite literally. Before I used it as a place to vent my feelings at the time when they weren't at their best.

 Therefore once I felt a bit better and felt like I didn't need to write about those things anymore I started having a negative association with my blog and sort of pushed it to one side. 

However, recently I have realised how much I do miss writing and people have even mentioned that it has been a while since they saw a new post. It made me think that although I started this blog at a time when I was struggling the positive outcomes outway the negatives massively. 

Not only have I have used it to help myself which really has worked wonders, the response from other people has been overwhelming. My passion is to help others and thats what I have done, I really couldn't be happier. 

Writing this blog has made think, feel and see things differently, I now even see myself differently. I have started to believe in myself more and finally accept me for being just me, which I think that everyone in the world should have the opportunity to believe.

I feel even more strongly about the importance of understanding that everyone is different and accepting individuality! 

I also discovered how good things can actually develop from the bad things and it so important to keep going and never give up. Realise that things do happen for a reason and there is a reason that things might take time to work out how you were hoping or first expected. 

I am not writing this to tell you all that everything is amazing in my life and there aren't times when I do still struggle, but isn't that just part of being human?

 I will continue to do my best at helping others through my blog etc. I promise that having just a tiny bit of belief in yourself, can be the start of something better.

I went to the cinema to see the film about Stephen Hawking's life , 'The Theory of Everything ' a couple of days ago.
The film was incredible by the way and you should definitely go and see it!! 
There was a quote in it from the man himself which pretty much sums up how I feel right now. 

 'We are all different, there is no such thing as a standard or run-of-the-mill human being, but we share the same human spirit. What is important is that we have the ability to create. This creativity can take many forms, from physical achievement to theoretical physics. However difficult life may seem there is always something you can do, and succeed at' (Stephen Hawking,2012) 

For the first time in ages I feel excited about the fresh new year we have ahead of us. I am grateful that I have the opportunity to forget about the times I have struggled in the past and use them to move forward and help others!

Happy New Year Everyone!!